Few things have helped me (and my husband) more in our recovery from addiction and betrayal trauma than emotional check-ins. This is a simple and powerful practice that helps foster connection with self and others.
I first learned how to do a check-in in LifeStar Therapy. Everyone is pretty sick when they first show up there so they started out easy by showing us a page of emojis to chose from. All we had to do was point to the face that best described how we were feeling. As easy as that sounds, it took some practice. Many addicts have shut off their emotions to sleep at night and their loved one's have shut off their emotions to keep breathing.
After trying many different check-in's, I decided that none of them had all the elements that I loved so I created my own. It is attached to the acronym C. H. E. C. K.- I. N.. If you have any questions, just reach out to me in the comments.
Emotionally connecting with self and partner
Clean living date: (What is the sobriety date? For the loved one, how is my serenity today?)
How have I worked recovery today? (Step work, exercise, scriptures, service, talking to sponsor....)
Emotions: (How do I feel today?)
Compliments: (Share the positives I see in my partner.)
Knots or Kinks in self: (What is my own junk to own and work on?)